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We ALL want to be together with our Twin Flame
The thing that all Twin Flames have in common is that no matter how hard they try, they forever feel the pull towards the beloved. Even the Twin Flame counterparts that are running, this morning I got a message from one of my Tribe clients to tell me her twin had reached out to her. A couple of weeks ago he had distanced himself quite dramatically and blocked her close to everywhere, now he was back and they ended up in a 3 hour Skype call.
Even when our Divine counterparts can’t quite put their finger on it, they can’t forget about us either. They don’t always show us or allow themselves to pursue their interest in us, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there. I remember at the beginning of 2015, my twin also admitted he couldn’t forget about me despite the fact that he was banging a chick in his friend’s circle (he left that part out, but I knew anyway…). Despite the fact that I am much older than my twin, that we had never met (at that time), never kissed and never made love – I was the last thought on his mind at night no matter how much he tried to forget me.
The ‘problem’ we face on the Twin Flame journey is not a lack of mutual attraction, even when your twin denies reciprocating your feelings. in 2016 my twin told me he didn’t love me, like I thought he did. He admired me, but he didn’t want a relationship with someone like me. When I asked him what that was supposed to mean, he said it was just a matter of preferences. He had done a complete 180 on me (in India he had told me that if it was up to him alone, we would already be together) and so when I told him that what he said made no sense. He gave up trying to explain it and told me to just blame him. By April 2017, on his third month wedding anniversary he took it all back and told me that he didn’t know if he would ever leave his wife (through an arranged marriage), but that if he would he would be on a plane the very next day to come to me. The client above her twin had shunned her when she proclaimed her feelings for him, he is twice her age and he was NOT going to go there. Now he is the one, seeking her out because he has feelings for her.
Of course in situations as these you have to respect the other person’s boundary, even when it makes no sense. You can’t keep pursuing them or try to get them to take it back. Don’t become a creepy stalker that doesn’t take no for an answer. I did not keep contacting my twin, trying to change his mind. I accepted that this was how he felt, a person has a right to change their mind. So even though I didn’t believe him for one second, I respected his right to not want to be in a relationship with me, even when I knew he wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him.
Fast-forward to today and I truly understand why we were not able to be together back then and instead had to go through everything we went through, including my twin having a baby at the beginning of this year. It’s those experiences that actually prepared me to become someone who can have and hold true Twin Flame union and not just a physical romantic relationship with my twin.
You are the ONLY one that can get yourself there
But this is exactly where I see it going wrong for so many Twin Flame couples, is that as soon as romance is delayed they get stuck, get pissed or drown in self-pity. This journey is not about your romantic fantasies coming true, it’s a fast-track to Ascension (which DOES NOT mean you won’t end up together).
This journey is about waking up to your true self and embodying your soul in the physical, but another problem within the Twin Flame community is that many people are so extremely full of themselves – they think they are already fully healed, awakened, ascended and so on – when in reality they haven’t even started to scratch the surface of what needs to be addressed.
There is always someone who wants to convince me that they are the exception to the rule and that they have healed themselves fully, without working with any healers. If you want to BS yourself like that go ahead, but I personally don’t understand why people think they can or need to heal themselves all by themselves. The people I know who ‘do all their own healing’ are some of the least healed people out there, because they are just going in circles rehashing their subconscious wounds over and over again because they can’t access their own blind spots.
They bang themselves on the chest, but in the meantime avoid facing their deepest wounding. This is of course a coping mechanism to avoid addressing their deepest pain, that stays untouched because their subconscious survival strategies keep them from being able to access it. If you think you are completely healed and you did it all by yourself, go book a session with a healer and find out how deeply you have been mindf*cking yourself. Almost ALL of our wounding, especially our deepest wounding is subconscious and you don’t know what you don’t know.
So it’s easy as pie to convince yourself you are all healed or that you have fully healed yourself, because the things you struggled with before are gone. But that DOES NOT mean that there isn’t more left to be addressed. There is lifetimes of past life wounding that we need to address as part of our Ascension process and people seriously think that a trip to Mt. Shasta heals it all. For those who don’t know, Mt. Shasta is one of the Earth’s chakras and I have been to a few of them. but travelling to these high energy places does not replace working with a healer.
You have to make the subconscious, conscious as part of your healing (Ascension) process and not find 21 million excuses to avoid facing your own inner darkness, because it’s not real. It’s an illusion. We are ALL innocent at our deepest essence.
So, when I say you are the ONLY one that can get you there, I don’t mean you have to do it ALONE – but no one will do it for you either. You have to be the driving force behind your own journey and this is another thing I see prevalent in the Twin Flame community the inability to take RESPONSIBILITY for one’s own life and happiness.
Last week’s guest article by Twin Flame astrologer Lilliana Thorvald is one of the most read and most shared articles highlighting the urgency to work on your healing NOW. People loved that article, shared the article all over the place but as I have found over and over again most people reading it will take ZERO action on it. A Facebook reader responding to that article sums up the collective’s attitude towards one’s individual journey perfectly:
- They know they are in pain
- They know they need to DO something and yet
- They do NOTHING or the wrong things – like the quick fixes that promise union the woo-woo way (but that don’t actually work)
You can’t expect to see results if you don’t take action.
NOBODY is going to hand you your much desired union on a silver platter. Your Twin Flame is not going to miraculously change their mind or come back, if you wait long enough, feel sorry for yourself long enough or stomp your feet and demand the Universe gives you what you want. You can think and tell yourself as much as you want that you are HEALED, but your twin isn’t – it won’t change a single effing thing (no matter how much spiritual ego you throw at it).
None of the above is going to shift your Twin Flame situationship, but if you spend a couple of hours in any random Twin Flame Facebook group you will see that this is how 99% of the Twin Flame collective approaches their individual journey and 98% to 99% of the Twin Flame collective simply REFUSES to do the real inner work that is needed to align to TRUE Twin Flame union.
I realize I am dishing it out raw, but I am not helping you by blowing smoke up your ass in the way that most Twin Flame websites do. You don’t need me to tell you how special, evolved or spiritual you are. It’s a prerequisite to be all that and more in order to be a part of the Ascension grounding team, you already made the cut – now it’s time to show everyone what you are made of. And staying stuck in analysis paralysis, resentment, victimhood and the likes will get you NOWHERE on your own Ascension path. You can’t usher in planetary Ascension, while you yourself are still firmly stuck in the old 3D paradigm.
If you are actively working with healers and facing your own inner dragons and demons, I commend you. You belong to the 1% to 2% who are taking the responsibility for their life and happiness into their own hands. You are in the driver’s seat of your own Ascension process. The rest is either not moving (wallowing in their pain and feeling victimized) or trying to trick the Universe by thinking that coming into Twin Flame union is as easy as putting on a pair of headphones and listening to someone merging your energy fields together (if it were that easy the whole collective would be in union by now!).
Coming into UNION is an inside job!
That is exactly the problem with the whole Twin Flame industry, it’s been hijacked by a bunch of people who SELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT, not what you need. People proclaiming to be in Twin Flame union when they are not, monetizing the juicy carrot your soul is dangling in front of you (your twin and your desire to be in a physical romantic relationship with them) because they know that is what you want most. But they are all lying to you, this journey was never about the Twin Flame – it has been about you all along.
Like Glinda the good witch tells Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz: “You’ve always had the power, my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.” This sums up the Twin Flame journey in a nutshell. You have had the power to create union all along, but it’s much more than a romantic relationship with your Twin Flame. Later the Scarecrow asks “Why didn’t you tell her before?!” Glinda responds, “She wouldn’t have believed me. She had to learn it for herself.” After this Dorothy finds the power within to return back home to Kansas through the power of her own thoughts.
In the same way the Twin Flame journey is not about returning home to Kansas (in our case ending up with the Twin Flame in a romantic relationship). It’s about realizing how powerful we are, that we are our Soul and not our ego. that we are immortal and eternal beings and that planet Earth is not our real home. We are not humans having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience. When we really KNOW this on a heart level, not just as a mental concept – we have managed to remember who we are on a soul level. We are ONENESS, but we have to learn it for ourselves first. True Twin Flame union is nothing but the outer reflection, of the oneness we have found within. So you see people only selling you the romantic fairy-tale come true are selling you short, this whole journey is about discovering the truth of WHO YOU REALLY ARE which is a lot more satisfying than merely coming into a romantic union – even if it is with your Twin Flame.
Don’t think so? That’s already a subconscious wound to work on, how could a relationship with someone else be more important than the relationship with yourself?
So in this article I will give you 11 concrete action steps that you can take NOW to align to inner union. Because true Twin Flame union is nothing but, the outer reflection of the inner union (with your soul) found within. It will take care of itself, it’s not something you need to pursue or try to make happen. Which is also why Twin Flame union meditations* are a no-no, they are you trying to control the outcome of the connection sugar coated with spiritual sauce to make it look ‘acceptable’. But when you strip the concept of all the external BS, what you are left with is the EGO trying to force what it wants – there is really nothing Divinely guided about such practices as I will explain further on at the end of this article.
11 action steps you can take right NOW
Let’s first start with which concrete action steps you can take RIGHT NOW that will bring you closer to Inner Union and align you deeper to true Twin Flame union. You do not have to be in Inner Union in order to be together with your Twin Flame in a romantic relationship. I have clients that are together with their twin who are not in Inner Union and also not in Twin Flame union. The souls use distance and closeness to bring up the subconscious wounding and so for some couples this means they come together relatively early on their journey, but they are often pulled apart at a later time for deeper inner soul work individually. Do not fall into the trap of thinking that those who are together with their Twin Flame have figured it all out, because they haven’t, they are also still working on coming into a harmonious union together.
Action step #1 LET GO of the romantic outcome
Your first action step is to let go of the romantic outcome. The fact that romance is being delayed is not because your twin is not into you. It’s to bring up the deeper subconscious wounding that is preventing you from seeing who YOU truly are on a soul level. This remains true even if your twin is being a grade A *sshole at the moment, telling you they don’t want to be with you or whatever they are dishing out. The fact that this is happening in YOUR reality is because it is helping you heal something painful on a much deeper level (for example abandonment issues, fear of loss, inner child wounding and so on).
You simply CANNOT wake up to the truth of who you are in a relationship with someone else, this whole set up is designed to keep you in romantic limbo land (aka single) long enough to get you to understand the truth about yourself. Because Twin Flame union is not merely ending up romantically with your twin, the time needed to come home to yourself is well spent because it lands you the REAL DEAL and not just a cheap impersonation of it.
Action step #2 Do your inner healing work
The next action step I want you to take right now, is BOOK A SESSION WITH A HEALER. You can book a session with me or with another healer. If you have never worked with a healer you can do a free e-course on my personal website that will help you get a better understanding of the healing work needed on the Twin Flame journey. Most people have absolutely NO CLUE what real healing work is or what it feels like. If someone else is doing all the healing work for you, you are probably not really healing. Healing calls for a deep shift in perspective that you make internally and so you need to be an active participant in your healing sessions.
Healing is not so much about fixing yourself where you are broken, it’s about releasing all your often past life fears and false beliefs that are keeping you from being able to see who you truly are. It’s about healing your own fragmentation within so that you can see your own wholeness and innocence again. In past life work for example it’s relatively easy to go to past lives where you were victimized, it’s a lot harder to face the lifetimes where you still hold judgement against yourself. These inner condemnations have to be released in order to come into inner union, so you need to face them instead of running away from them.
Action step #3 Live the life you want to live now
Don’t wait for your Twin Flame or anyone else to BE with you in order to live the life you want. If all you want in your life is a partner (preferably your twin) then you are trying to live your life vicariously. That isn’t a life, that is a DEPENDENCY. If you are not clear on what the life you want to live, looks like, pull out a piece of paper and a pen and write it out. Ask yourself what your IDEAL life looks like, of course you want a partner in your life – but you don’t want to make your partner your life. Because that is a very unhealthy dynamic that will bite you in the butt sooner or later. If this is you, this is what you need to heal asap.
Once you have your IDEAL LIFE crystal clear, start taking action in creating it even it means you have to level up. When my twin got married in 2017 I asked myself what I wanted to create now that my romantic dreams with him had gone up in smoke. I realized I wanted to travel and move to Ibiza, I am still traveling but I have also lived in Ibiza a couple of months the past two winters. In April 2017 I had nowhere near the money it takes to live in Ibiza, so I had to level up.
Now two years later I am living the life of my dreams and literally the only thing my twin needs to do is get on an airplane if that is our destiny. I did NOT put my life on hold these past almost six years since we met, waiting for him to storm in as a knight in shining armor to save me from my own misery. Instead I created a life for myself, that I am utterly excited to wake up to in the morning whether the man that I love is with me or not.
If it were you, would you want a partner who has created an amazing life for themselves or would you want someone who is waiting for you to make their life mean something?
Be the person you are looking for.
Action step #4 Stop self sabotaging
All self sabotage is subconscious, but do you know that MOST of your self sabotage are past lives bleeding through? The NUMBER #1 reason things do not work out for us, the way we want them to is because we are still PLAYING OUT past life karma in our current reality. This past life karmic residue attracts to us the situations, people and experiences in our today life that offer us an opportunity to heal our past.
It is a whole lot easier to CLEAR OUT this past through for example the Akashic Record Clearings I offer, where we dive deep into your subconscious and past lives to heal the karmic patterns that are keeping you from moving forward in your own life now. One of the most spectacular self sabotages I cleared was a past life that was keeping a cap on my income, clearing the involved past life allowed me to bust through the 10K per month income ceiling that many entrepreneurs are stuck under.
Money issues are often carry overs from past life trauma, in my case my family had committed me to a mental asylum because I was blowing away the family fortune in their eyes. They had me committed to get back control over the family fortune, to which I had been the heir. The traumatic experience of going crazy in a mental asylum had left me believing that being rich meant losing everything including myself, which my 2012 reality was mirroring back to me perfectly. I cleared this past life belief in the fall of 2012 together with a healer and by January 2013 I made my first €10.000,– a month (this was even before I met my Twin Flame).
Action step #5 Get out of your comfort zone
As part of the Ascension journey we need to unplug ourselves from the 3D matrix that is COMPLETELY fear-based. This can only be accomplished by facing our fears, even the ones we didn’t know we had because they were subconscious. Getting out of our comfort zones in all areas of our lives, brings us face to face with our inner fears.
It’s only when we face our fears and look them straight in the eye that we can release them. Sometimes we need a little bit of help. In 2015 after not flying for almost 2 decades I had to get on an airplane all by myself for an 8 hour flight to India to meet my twin in real life. I made it, but it was tough – halfway through the flight I asked my neighbor to please talk to me because I was on the verge of a massive panic attack. My neighbor was happy to kill time as well and soon I was relaxed again and out of my fearful thinking. Despite the fact that I had been flying since I was a little kid, I had developed fear of flight and so I went to hypnotherapy to overcome it and now I am fine on an airplane again.
Overcoming our fears is a vital part of our Ascension journey, because fear counteracts and diminishes our trust in the Universe. Fear shows us where we doubt the Universe or ourselves and these are part of the subconscious wounds that we need to heal. Because fear is ALWAYS a product of trauma from this lifetime or previous lifetimes. People who drowned in a previous lifetime can have extreme fear of water in this lifetime, healing the past life trauma cures them of their aqua phobia. In my case a current lifetime teenage trauma, caused the aviophobia I had been experiencing, healing my teenage trauma cured me of fear of flying. This is why you shouldn’t just learn to live with your fears, because the fear is merely a SYMPTOM of an unhealed subconscious wound.
Action step #6 Reparent your inner child
Most 3D romantic love relationships are made up of two people who are subconsciously trying to get from their partner, what they missed getting from their parents as a child. This can be love, approval, safety, affection, attention and so on. This is also why so many relationships lead to disappointment and break-ups because a partner cannot fix what went wrong in your childhood. You need to take your own responsibility for what you lacked growing up and reparent your inner child.
Reparenting your inner child is not complicated, it’s fully taking the responsibility for your own inner child and being the parent it needed but didn’t have. The most recent example from my own life was that as a child, my mother spent three months in the United States while I remained at home with my father and two half sisters. During my mother’s absence my father sexually abused me and my youngest half sister. Because this happened in my mother’s absence my inner child created the false belief that only when my mother was with me, was I safe (this was all in line with my past life wounding which it was meant to help me release). I was between 3 and 4 years old at the time, so this became a subconscious belief that I wasn’t aware of believing consciously.
When it did become conscious, reparenting my inner child became a question of letting my inner child know that what happened will never happen again (my father is deceased) and that she can now count on ME to be safe. As you may know I am currently traveling the world with my mother and my teenage son which means I am with my mother 24/7. So in order to really be my own safety, I left the apartment my family is staying in and moved into an apartment of my own. Being in my own space all by myself allows me to really put this new shift into practice. The Universe helped me by getting me the almost last apartment on a cliff, in a close to deserted summer vacation residence. Also for some reason the outside street lighting is not working on my apartment which means that at night it’s pitch dark around my house. All ideal circumstances to show my inner child how excellent I am at keeping her safe and that she can really trust me to take care of her.
Action step #7 Declutter your life (let go of the past)
Releasing past life karma is what makes the Ascension process possible in the first place. According to Twin Flame and Ascension teacher Elizabeth Clare Prophet we have to balance 51% of our karma in order to ascend. Karma is a tricky subject because most people, don’t actually understand what it means they see it as punishment or rewards for past actions which is old paradigm thinking connected to a vengeful parent God.
In reality there is no great big scorekeeper in the sky judging your every move, you are the one keeping score subconsciously and so karma is all unresolved energy from the past. This includes trauma, self judgment, self hatred, blame, guilt, shame, self loathing, resentment, hatred and all other misinterpretations and misunderstanding of what happened on a soul level. This is WHY past life work is so important, not to bang yourself on the chest about how important you were in a previous lifetime but in order to release the karmic residue you were still carrying with you.
As I have explained before when we do not CLEAR the past vibrational residue of these experiences, we are forced to PLAY them out in our current life reality. Because they will attract to them the people, situations and experiences that will help us re-enact our trauma in an attempt to heal it this time around. Playing out your past life trauma, is what creates your current life drama and that is why it’s better to clear it out – like we do in the Akashic Record Clearings.
Action step #8 Go travel
Nothing answers the question whether you REALLY TRUST that the Universe has your back as going travelling to foreign and new places. This doesn’t only apply to women who often are and feel more vulnerable abroad, it applies to men as well. I recently met a guy around thirty at a retreat I attended, who had just visited India and shared an experience travelling by train through India. He had gotten into an empty sleeping coupe and had fallen asleep, when he woke up he saw that there were around 10 Indian men with him in the coupe and he thought ‘This is it, this is going to end bad.’ (his mind running riot and envisioning his death). As little as 15 minutes later they were talking about body workouts and training routines and he had an amazing rest of his journey.
For me also trusting the Universe got a completely different meaning when I started full-time travelling 1,5 years ago. Travelling has really allowed me to deepen my trust in the Universe, let go of control and learn to just flow with life. No matter how well you plan things, where you end up is always going to be a surprise if you haven’t been there before. Sometimes it exceeds your expectations, sometimes you don’t want to stay and you need to find a new place.
I have really learned to listen to my inner guidance when I don’t like where I have ended up and sometimes like in Dubai, it’s as easy as shifting to the hotel across the intersection to feel comfortable again. I had paid full in advance and the hotel refused to refund the money in cash. So I had to pay twice for the same time period in two different hotels and it was a very difficult process to get refunded at all, but then due to a glitch I was refunded both by the hotel and the booking agent after I left the country. Not only did I not have to pay hotel number 1, they paid my stay at hotel number 2 where we had a great stay!
I had no idea what to expect of Dubai and I had no idea if I would like it. I had been to India and Egypt, which had not been my favorite places. I went to Dubai to visit a friend and because my son had wanted to go there. Apparently Dubai is very hip in the eyes of teenagers because while we were there, an old classmate of my son had also convinced his mom to take him there and the two kids met up for an amazing day in Aquaventure waterpark.
We LOVED Dubai, it’s modern, it’s women friendly and safe – they have great food and lots of organic shops and cafes. Where in India (we flew from India to Dubai) organic shops are close to non-existent, Dubai had shops that were like American Whole Foods Markets fully stocked and everything that you would want from fresh produce to everything else including halal organic meat and beef bacon. You could buy pork as well, I believe but it was in a far off side-room not to offend the local Muslim community also shopping there. We ended up staying in Dubai for 6 weeks, living between the locals, feeling right at home. When it comes to public bathrooms Dubai is my favorite, the bathrooms are so nice and clean in all public areas. Those Emirati’s really know how to organize their public space because everything is super well organized in Dubai.
In Egypt we had survived 45 degrees Celsius and a walk through the slums of Luxor with a man who claimed to work as a cook in the hotel we stayed in. He was helping us find a white outfit to visit the temples. At some point I had no clue where we were and my mom and I were exhausted by the extreme heat that we are simply not used to coming from a cold and rainy country. The man put us in a taxi and dropped us off at our hotel, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit anxious here and there wondering if we had made a mistake trusting him. In both India and Dubai you can walk in the street and no one will bother you, but in Egypt as a tourist you are fair game and as long as you are not being chaperoned by one of them, everyone will try and talk to you or sell you something.
Going to a hospital abroad is also one of those experiences that calls for trust. In Dubai I managed to get a very painful ear infection. My friend took me to a free public hospital with separate waiting rooms for men and women, I came in for an ear ache but I had to also tell them when I last had my period! The doctor who treated me was a hot Hungarian guy who spoke perfect English, he prescribed me painkillers and antibiotics that had me pain free within days. I had my checkup in a private hospital because we moved uptown in the mean time, the Desi doctor there prescribed me natural ear drops with essential oils to help heal the effects of the antibiotics.
In India during the Twin Flame retreat I was hosting, I had lost a tooth filling and had to get it fixed. Because everyone was working I had to go by myself and again the Universe, set me up with a perfect English speaking dentist who regularly visited Amsterdam for dentist related conferences plus an Uber driver that waited outside for me during the procedure.
Travelling has really allowed me to see how willing the Universe is in even the most challenging circumstances to have my back and take care of the details perfectly, in a way that I could have never orchestrated myself even if I tried. This has been a very healing experience for my inner control freak and has helped me release such patterns more and more.
Action step #9 Learn to love yourself
This is such a hype term at the moment that hardly means what you think it means. Sure if you are still being nasty to yourself in your mind or not taking good care of yourself, you can learn how to be more consciously loving towards yourself BUT most of our inability to truly love ourselves stems from our subconscious of course.
All the childhood memories of shame, blame, guilt, not being good enough topped up with all your past life feelings of self loathing, self hatred, judgment, more shame, blame and guilt and so on is what is truly keeping you from fully loving yourself.
To enter the Inner Union stage of the Twin Flame journey, we need to let go of ALL the places where we are consciously or subconsciously pitched against ourselves. This is again why past life work is so important, because this is where these self-rejecting emotions stem from. Heal the places where you are rejecting yourself and you will heal this self-rejection being mirrored back to you through the people and situations in your today’s physical reality.
NO AMOUNT of deliberate self love can completely counteract the effects of subconscious feelings that contradict your conscious intentions. You have to erase the subconscious past life beliefs of not being lovable, good enough or a good person to begin with. Because as long as you don’t erase these false beliefs about yourself, they will continue to undermine you. Self love is much more than treating yourself to a relaxing spa day or splurging on an expensive fashion item and so investing in shifting these internal places where you are pitched against yourself will do you more good than pampering yourself does in terms of increasing self love.
Action step #10 Get to know yourself
Another thing you will start to understand through your Twin Flame and Ascension journey is that you have no clue of who you really are and that who you thought you were was based on fears and false beliefs from previous lifetimes mixed into a toxic cocktail of familial, societal, religious, ancestral and cultural programming and conditioning. In short you have been playing the game of life so long, you started to get lost in the roles and characters you played – forgetting who you truly are.
Just before I started coming into the Inner Union process I first had to release all the identifications of what other people had told we I was based on their perception of me and of course their own (hidden) agendas. As I had gone down the rabbit hole of understanding my own unique series of past lives and how they were all connected and released the false identifications I had held because of it, I could start to see my current life false beliefs about myself and how they too connected to my past life experiences.
But the thing is knowing who you are NOT, doesn’t equal knowing who you are and so after removing all the layers of the false self I still had to get to know the true self which has opened up to me little by little, step by step. The last thing you want to do is go into a relationship with someone at this point, because you first need to get to know yourself and what you need and like. It’s exciting to be part of a romantic couple of course, but a partnership can only be as good as the sum of the two people in it. If you both have no clue who you truly are and what you want out of life, that will be what your relationship will look like as well; clueless and not really going anywhere.
If you want to be a part of a power-couple you need to be sure that you have something to bring to the table, because a gushing heart and blind admiration is not what power-couples are made of. They are made of two strong individuals who know who they are and what they are worth and they also know what they want out of life and how to work together to make it happen. As long as you have no clue who you are, you can’t expect a potential partner to have figured it out either – so use your time NOW to get to know who you really are instead of who you were brought up to believe you are by other people.
Action step #11 Create your own happiness
‘When you can be happy with or without your heart’s desire, it will suddenly appear, for your ship will come in over a “don’t care” sea. Be happy, and something will happen.’
Florence Scovel Shinn
We tend to think that only when the Universe gives us what we want, our happy-end with our Twin Flame can we be happy – but it works the other way around. When we can be happy with or without OUR BIG DREAM COME TRUE, it will show up in our lives and often quite unexpectedly.
So instead of waiting for an outer circumstance to define your happiness, you need to go within to create your own happiness within. Ask yourself what makes you happy and do more of it, it’s that simple. Happiness is really a question of filling your own cup first and doing the things that bring you joy. This can be as simple as spending an hour out in nature every single day. I love nature and it is an important part of my happiness. I don’t do well in asphalt jungles such as New York for very long, because I need luscious greens and trees around me.
You can find happiness in your mission/vocation, in charity work, in playing with pets, picking up a hobby, etc. It’s your responsibility to create a life worth living for yourself, you cannot burden someone else with the task of being your source of happiness because then you become someone’s ball and chain – you imprison them (if they allow it).
Plus you will wreck a perfectly good relationship by making your happiness depend on the other, especially if your significant other is a man. Making a woman happy is very important to men, it is in fact so important that men base their masculinity off on the extend to how happy their woman is. You being happy is super important to your man. So guess what happens to him when your happiness is up down and all over the place, because he is not doing or giving you what you want? Yep, he feels emasculated. The more emasculated he feels, the less capable he will feel of making you happy and eventually he will give up trying. So don’t make someone else responsible for your happiness, it’s not healthy for you and it wrecks your relationship.
Happiness can also just be a question of brain chemistry and so changing your diet to organic and clean foods, limiting processed foods that make your blood sugar rise and plummet and your mood as well can help in feeling more centered and happy.
Of course also here addressing current and past life traumas helps you feel more at peace and satisfied from within. The deeper you go in unfucking yourself (liberating yourself from the hold the past has on you) the less you get triggered by mishaps or other people’s drama. It just doesn’t affect you anymore, because you dealt with your own pain and so there is nothing left to trigger.
I pray these 11 action steps serve you and help you work towards true Twin Flame union. But remember Twin Flame union, is nothing but the reflection of the union found within with your own soul. The Twin Flame journey is not about the Twin Flame it never was, it has always been about you. So whether your twin is with you or not, whether you are blocked or text once in a while, none of these outer circumstances matter – you don’t NEED your Twin Flame to acknowledge, love or talk to you in order for you to be able to come into Inner Union.
So you have ZERO excuse to not take action now and go and create the fairy-tale life you dream of. If your person is meant for you, you will end up together but first you have to stop WAITING for them to return before you get on with your life.
If you are interested and excited to know how we can help you in your Twin Flame journey and Ascension process, check out the Tribe Mystery School for modern-day Initiates on the Twin Flame and Ascension path. In our signature program, the Inner Union Soul Alchemy Program we walk you step by step through the process of coming into inner union with your own soul. Inner union, is a prerequisite for true Twin Flame union and creating ‘Heaven on Earth’ from the inside out. You can also book an Akashic Record Clearing to release deep pain and trauma (including fears and false beliefs) from this and previous lifetimes.
Sending you love and light on your Ascension path and Divine partnership journey, you are forever protected and guided. All is well.
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*P.s. I realize that reading all this, it seems easier to buy Twin Flame audio meditations that will guide your higher selves in the union process. It sounds very desirable and much easier than actually having to work for it. But hold on a minute, in which crazy alter reality does your 3D and ego self need to instruct your own or your twin’s higher self (or even just guide them) how to come into union?! They already know how to do this of course.
That’s an ego based concept in itself, because why would you know better than your higher selves how to come into union? It’s a soul process, not an ego process – so why would the 3D self/ego need to direct it (control or micro-manage it)? That’s absurd thinking, which is why I keep telling you that the people selling you these kind of quick fixes are selling you WHAT YOU WANT, not what you need.
The higher selves do not need us to show them how to come into unity (union) together and the idea that you would need to energetically force or simulate what you imagine a ‘union process’ to look like is preposterous. All of the energetic work that needs to be done for union, will happen on it’s own when you have done the inner work to actually PREPARE for it. You cannot take Heaven by force and you cannot bypass the process that is part of the preparation for the union process to take place.
That is like wanting to have your college degree without having to study for it, you would not be able to work in the field you have attained the degree for because you did nothing to prepare yourself to work in this field. You didn’t actually study. Even if you got a job, it would become painfully obvious quite quickly that you are not equipped to do the job because you didn’t prepare yourself adequately.
Doing Twin Flame union meditations in the same way is trying to force a certain outcome without preparing for it adequately. You may get what you want, but you won’t be able to hold onto it because you didn’t do the inner work required to BE in union (aka heal your subconscious fears and false beliefs). Your Twin Flame will keep triggering you left and right because you refused to take responsibility for your own wounding. I don’t have an issue with the people offering such products, I understand that they also just want to earn a buck. It’s nothing personal. I have an issue with the fact that these products and services DON’T WORK and that they create karma as well because you are going against spiritual law when you try to force what you want into reality.
Like I said I know you want to be in union with your twin more than anything, I really get that – but I am completely honest with you when I tell you Twin Flame union is not the point. Inner union is the point and Twin Flame union is the physical reflection of your union within. All these other Twin Flame teachers claiming to be in union are lying to you and also often lying to themselves, those who are in a physical relationship with their twin are only in a physical union but that is not the same as Twin Flame union.
They are selling UNION because they know you want it more than anything and it’s what you are willing to invest in. It’s a great business model for them and has made many millionaires, but in the end all they are selling is a bunch of hot air and you are left with a house of cards that comes tumbling down because your work was not built on a solid foundation. Don’t let someone pulling the union card and offering you quick fixes fool you – if they were truly in union they would teach you how to come into inner union first.