Becoming the heroine in your Twin Flame story, is your expectation of true love looking like a fairy tale keeping you from forging ahead on your journey?

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No guts, no glory

There is no place in life that the phrase ‘no guts, no glory‘ applies to as much as to those on the Twin Flame journey.

I actually want a t-shirt with this text, just to put on on those days that you lose all faith and think ‘What the F am I doing? Why am I even still on this journey?’

We all have these days, you know. Myself included.

Because let’s just be honest about it, these Twin Flame connection are just about the weirdest love relationships ever. They often look nothing like the fairy tale romances that we have been conditioned to expect or actually they do, we just never realized how much also the female heroines in our favorite bedtime stories had major obstacles to overcome.

Let’s take a look at that for a moment shall we, although it seems that the fairy tale heroines were passive, they also had their own rites of passage to go through.

Our bedtime story heroines did not just meet, kiss, get hitched and lived happily ever after. They (just like us) had to fight for their love. Except this part of their story was never emphasized to us. This deeper understanding of what these fairy tales were really about, was lacking in the people who were reading them to us. But the truth has always been there to see for when we were ready to look into these stories a little bit deeper.

None of these fairy tale heroines got their love handed to them on a silver platter, they had to face inner and outer challenges to come into alignment with true love manifesting itself in their physical reality. Some even had to wait for ages for their Divine Masculine to find them. So lets look at some of the obstacles that these fairy tale Divine Feminines had to overcome:

  • Snow White was sent out to be killed, then fled into the forest where she lived with the seven dwarfs and the evil stepmother attempted several more times to take Snow Whites life (sounds like a dark night of the soul to me). Her final attempt seemed successful, when Snow White took a bite of the poisoned apple. Although it appears Prince Charming did all the work by moving her casket which dislodged the poisoned piece of apple from Snow Whites mouth, let’s get real here – Snow White actually had to keep her body alive while poisoned and probably choking in order for the prince to be able to find a revivable body and not a dead corpse.
  • Cinderella was greatly obstructed from meeting and coming together with her true love, by her stepmother and stepsisters who first gave her so much work she could barely get it done. Then when she finished her work and was dressed for the prince’s party, they tore her outfit to pieces and then even after she had made it to the ball looking fabulous and had finally met her prince, the stepsisters and their mother tried to keep the prince from uniting with his one true love.
  • Rapunzel was cast into the desert by the enchantress where she had to deliver twin babies all by herself (Can you imagine birthing twins by yourself? I can’t but it is part of the original fairy tale.). It was not until her blind beloved stumbled into the desert and her tears hit his eyes, clearing them so he could see her – that they were reunited again.
  • Sleeping Beauty was cursed as a baby and no matter how her parents tried to save her from the fate that was cast upon her, she pricked herself on the spinning wheel and fell into a deep slumber. The same applies here as with Snow White, that if Sleeping Beauty had not kept herself alive during her 100 year soul sleep the prince would have found a dead corpse instead of a sleeping princess. The Soul sleep signifying 100 years of inner work.
  • Beauty had to learn unconditional love when she was forced against her will to live with the Beast. She had to look past his outer appearance in order to recognize his inner beauty. She had to overcome her own inner selfishness, which was what got the Beast in trouble in the first place (the sacred mirror) when his selfishness had gotten him on the wrong side of a witch who then cast a spell upon him and turned him in the Beast. It wasn’t until Beauty experienced the freedom of choice, that she could choose for her love for him and hurry back to the castle to save the Beast from dying, her unconditional love transforming him back into the prince he was before the witch had cast a spell on him.
  • The little mermaid had to endure great physical pain to transform her fish tail into human legs and had to let go of her attachment to her father and sisters to win the love of her prince, which if she would fail would break her heart and make her return to foam as the crest on the waves. But if she succeeded she would attain an immortal soul. The witch who transformed her cut her tongue so she couldn’t sing or speak and when her true love married someone else she was given a chance to come back home to her family and avert her own death by killing him. She threw the dagger into the sea and accepted her fate, instead of death she was made a daughter of the air, because of her great sacrifice and love for the prince. As daughter of the air she could progress on her journey to attain an immortal soul.

If these fairy tale Divine Feminines had not fought for the love of their lives, they would have never experienced their happy endings of happily ever after. Even the little mermaid, who in the original Hans Christian Andersen version did not get her prince, through her love for her beloved and her sacrifice – she got her shot at immortality nonetheless, which was what she desired most.

These fairy tale characters are the epitome of ‘no guts, no glory‘ as they courageously faced all the challenges that were between them and manifesting true love in their physical reality. Even when these heroines may have not consciously known, true love was on it’s way – their soul knew and prepared them by having them play the role they had to play.

Are you shying back or plunging in the deep?

Does this then mean that the Twin Flame journey has to be this horrendous feat or a painful journey of self sacrifice? No, it doesn’t. Every journey is unique and custom tailored to the needs of the Twin Flame couple, for them to come back to their own Soul truth and Oneness.

However because there is such a collective concept of what ‘true love‘ looks like, one of the major struggles we face on the Twin Flame journey is breaking through societies and our own concept of true love. How often have you been told ‘If (s)he really loved you, (s)he would have…..’ ?

Or how often have you thought ‘If (s)he really loved me, (s)he would have…..’ ? These questions are all triggered because the collective consciousness thinks that fairy tale love is handed to you on a silver platter, it’s not something you have to invest in or fight for. It’s just this magical thing that drops in your lap, out of nowhere.

Yet, when we reread those exact fairy tales where this idea originated from, we see that even in fairy tales – the fairy tale love we believe in as a collective does not exist. There might not be so much to overcome in regards to the lover in fairy tales, but this out of this world love that these fairy tale stories tell us about certainly did not just fall into the characters laps as you just read. Even the Divine Feminine’s in these stories had inner work to do, karma to resolve (people cursing you or wanting to kill you is often past life related) and lessons to learn – think of Beauty and learning to love unconditionally or Cinderella who had to forgive her stepmother and sisters for their incessant interference…

The truth is fairy tale love does not come served to you on a silver platter.
(It demands you release all your inner blocks to be able to fully align to it.)

It might have appeared so to us women, because the role of the prince and the challenges he had to overcome where overly emphasized to us. Making it look like, fairy tale love was something only the Divine Masculine fought for in the various outer challenges he faced like slaying dragons, searching the lands for the one who would fit the shoe, wandering blind through the forest, etc. But really it just depends on what part of the story you are in, the female counterparts of these fairy tale heroes had to all do work prior or after meeting their true love in order for the story to reach a happy end.

It’s when you see true love in this light, where both parties have their own inner and outer blocks to overcome to reach an and they lived happily ever after, that you can see that Twin Flame love fully complies to the real definition of actual true love. The true love, that fairy tales are made of.

At the same time when you subconsciously still believe in the collective consciousness definition of fairy tale love, something that is just served to you on a silver platter. A knight in shining armor that dashes into your life and saves you while you sit back and do nothing but wait for him to come into your life and through overcoming all challenges in his way – proving his undying love for you… it will be difficult for you to recognize the invitation to true love, the Universe is extending to you. Chances are you will shy away, instead of plunging in deep simply because what you have been taught about true love tells you, this is not it.

Without going too deeply off subject, the emphasize on the hero’s journey and the underplaying of the role the heroine plays in co-creating this fairy tale love and a and they lived happily ever after is part of the patriarchal conditioning that has led to the idea of male supremacy to his feminine counterpart. Exactly one of the paradigms Twin Flames have come to collapse in this time, because there is no chance of Twin Flame union until you equally value both your inner masculine and inner feminine. They both play an equally important role even if this is not always as obvious, think again of Snow White if she had not kept herself alive in awaitance of her true love, the prince would have found a corpse and he would have not been able to revive her and fulfill his role as hero in bringing her back to life.

Are you secretly waiting for a knight in shining armor to come and rescue you?

Buying into this patriarchal emphasis of the hero’s part in the journey might have fully left you dis-empowered, not seeing the importance of your own role in your heroic journey together.

For the Divine Masculines reading this article (which can be men or women) this false interpretation of the fairy tales and the over-emphasis on your role could have also triggered you to take over-responsibility in the connection or caused the opposite, which was for you to pull back because it seemed to be an insurmountable task and almost an overburden. As it seemed like you had to do all the work alone.

Now back to the Divine Feminines who might be subconsciously waiting for their knight in shining armor to come and rescue them, this is another paradigm that Twin Flames have come to collapse and that is the conditional love program including co-dependency, which wishing for a knight in shining armor to come and save you, boils down to.

You need to be getting on with your own life whether who you believe to be your Twin Flame will be a part of it or not. You need to have your own strong foundation in life, emotionally, mentally, physically and financially. You need to reach a place in your life that you don’t need to be saved, but that you are fine on your own – no matter what comes up next. Our sleeping princesses might not be the best archetypal examples of that but Rapunzel and Beauty and the little mermaid certainly are.

The interesting thing is that the Twin Flame encounter often opens up a complete new road for us to travel, but because we are not sure if our twin loves us in the same way – we often don’t dare to really push through and follow that path. Subconsciously waiting to be saved becomes a double whammy then in which we:

  • don’t recognize true love because we conceive conditional love to be the norm and
  • disown our own inner masculine, by projecting it outward as our rescuer

How to become the heroine of your own story

I actually love this variation on the no gut’s no glory credo which says:

No guts No glory
No legend No story

Which brings us back to where we started, this often wacky weird Twin Flame love that looks nothing like what we were taught true love would look like. Most of your family and friends thinking you are utterly insane for putting up with all the strange twists and turns this journey can take you on. You yourself sometimes even doubting if you are on the right path, it happens to the best of us. Even to the people teaching this stuff, like me.

But something miraculous happens when you step into the fairy tale reality which is nothing less than resolving to live your life in 5D, instead of the 3D reality most people are still living in at this moment. It takes F-ing guts, to do this. To go against all collective conditioning, to look deeper into all the things our 3D environment has led us to believe to be the truth, often fully aligned to rational thinking. But the truth is rational thinking, however useful it can be in daily life does not challenge you to show guts. It rather encourages to play things safe and only trust on the logical and what can be seen in the physical.

If you do not dare to lead an exceptional life and reach for this out of this world love, you will just lead a mediocre life and you will never know true love. I know it is scary as hell to dive in deep in this connection of which you are not even sure it’s not something that you are just imagining. I have been there myself, with my twin literally telling me that I was trying to make something out of nothing… as in that he did not love me, when I asked him what he meant.

Let me be honest with you, there is no 100% guarantee that you will overcome all the obstacles on your way and in the end will end up with your twin and live happily ever after. But I can guarantee you this, this fairy tale love most certainly will not become your reality if you never even tried.

In one of the last conversations my twin and I had in my hotel room in India, we were discussing our future and I asked him to take over my branding company and clients, so I could pursue living my life purpose which was not fully clear to me at all at that moment. Instead he said ‘Why don’t you become an international speaker? You can make loads of money that way and I can book you everywhere…‘ I replied that I did want that, but in three years because I was not ready yet and I first wanted this baby that I had felt wanted to be born to us.

Even before I came to India my twin once texted me, ‘You don’t need me, you have the whole world waiting for you.‘ I recently texted him back, that that statement seemed to be more true than he and I ever could have imagined. I have always known that I came into this world to do something big. Yet I never expected it to be this, or to witness such an explosive growth of this website and the people following me.

So recently a friend of mine with also an Indian twin and a high profile personality, (on her flight to India one of the stewardesses recognized her from television and had read her book… ) asked me to come with her to an event around public speaking. I was mildly interested in the subject as I am now just entering year two of the three years I had mentioned to my twin, but above all I thought it would be nice to hang out with her a day and catch up.

During the event I became more and more interested as they presented a program to help you get your message out there and on international stages. So like I always ask for signs from the Universe I shot myself an email asking for a sign. I asked for a golden key, but as it was a $2K investment I wanted to really know that it was a sign from the Universe and not a random gold key, so I asked for a golden key with a heart.

It took eight days in which I had already decided to go to another event and then lo and behold I get my sign that I had asked for and that meant that I was going to go to London to do this course. By now I actually didn’t want to go anymore as I was much more excited about going to the other event.

But I knew because I had asked the Universe for this sign and gotten it, that I had to now follow through and buy the course whether I felt like it or not. I also had to laugh at the Universes ingeniousness and sense of humor giving me this sign with the text ‘Twin Flame Message’ on it. Because that was my motivation in the first place to sign up for the course, in order to help me get the Twin Flame message out there on the international stages to help people get a better understanding of the journey they find themselves on and give them the tools they need to make this journey the amazing miracle filled adventure, that it is meant to be. Even the first line of this message would be how I would approach it, because there is no fixing the Twin Flame relationship with 3D techniques in order to make it work.

You need a whole new set of skills which I teach in the Align to your Divine Plan, Twin Flame Mastery Program that only The Twin Flame Tribe members have access to.

Honestly I have no clue if or when my Twin Flame, will come back to me. The last thing he communicated to me at the beginning of this year was that he will love me forever, but that he first needed to work through some stuff on his own. This was right after I stepped into my Twin Flame leadership and it was a bitter sweet moment.

What I do know is that I would never be where I am today if I had not had the guts to align to this out of this world love that I experienced with my twin. Preparing for a mutual future by going international with my company (which was not Twin Flame directed at first) so that we could be together in any place in the world, my country, his country or any other country… Even now not by my own pursuit, but by chance (Divine design) I was invited to this event on public speaking that I otherwise would have not gone to as I had just decided that I was not going to go to any of the events held by this organization anymore. I had just been to one of their lower entry events for the 5th time about and just felt it was done. Now I bought two premium programs with them, because that where the next steps that the Universe was showing me to take.

Anyway even though my twin is not with me in the physical at this moment, I am still being propelled forward in the same direction as we discussed on one of our last nights together. Although neither of us ever expected I would be working with Twin Flames. But I also got here to this place as a Twin Flame teacher and healer by following my inner knowing and the signs the Universe threw my way. It took ALL the guts I had to step into this spot the Universe was nudging me towards, while my own Divine Masculine was off doing his own thing and I had nothing but 5D signs telling me it was going to be okay and to take the leap of faith.

So if your scared, that’s okay – but do it anyway.

You need to grow some nuts

If you are just waiting or hoping for your twin to return, you could actually be sabotaging your own journey without realizing it. You have to do your own part of the journey in order to align to the manifestation of your heart’s desire.

If you are doubting and holding back because you are afraid you will plunge yourself in misery if you go for this, fearing it’s all just an illusion. It isn’t. Don’t be afraid to look like a fool. This journey is rigged in your favor, no matter what – you will come out as a winner.

Who gives a sh*t what others might think? Many people shook their head and pitied me, the fact that my twin kept me as a big secret did not help either. His friends thought he was not interested in me at all. I knew what was true and kept my course and surprised everyone when my twin defied all customs and traditions when we were together.

When my twin didn’t show up at the airport when I left India, my team members told me that if he would have loved me, he would have been there. I remember really having a realization there at that moment that I knew 100% for sure, that I would see my Twin Flame again in this lifetime and that this was not a final goodbye. Back then even though my twin had just repeated four times on the phone with a broken voice, full of emotion that he wished he was coming with me – I allowed their remarks of what love should look like to make me doubt his love for me.

Since then I grew some balls and started to only trust my own judgment, something my twin had mirrored me when he told me if it was only up to him, we would already be together and have everything we always talked about – but he just didn’t dare to trust his own judgment and risk hurting his family.

So I knew when my twin told me there was no love from his side, that he would take it back, just like the last time he tried to convince me and himself that he didn’t love me. It took him a little less than a year this time to tell me he would love me forever. Even when he could not be together with me at this time.

Spirit has shown me that my own journey has been used to fully prepare me for my work with Twin Flames and even the energy I use in the Twin Flame Reunion Journeys to help twins find their own blocks to union in both this life and past lives, was given to me after I visited my twin in India. It was a gift that was unlocked due to the Kundalini rising, unleashed by our connected chakras in our Twin Flame intimacy.

When my twin does come back in my life, I will have much to show for. But even if he never returns, look at where it brought me.

So my message to you today is, grow some nuts. Show some guts, so that you can become the legend in your own story – whichever way your soul has intended that for you in this lifetime.

You cannot fail on this journey, trust me on this. No matter where it will lead you to a life with or without your Twin Flame, you will come out for the better. I promise you.

But in order to come to this point, you have to jump in the deep end first.

Stop waddling around in the shallow end baby, waiting for your twin to signal that it’s safe for you to come in the deep end (promising he will catch you if you fall or confirming his/her love for you). It doesn’t work like that on this journey. My twin told me he will love me forever AFTER I took my leap in faith, not before.

You have to become the heroine of your own story and that aligns you to your happy ending, no matter what that looks* like.

Sending you love and light on your Ascension path and Divine partnership journey, you are forever protected and guided. All is well.

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Lots of love,

Sabriyé Dubrie


*That is one of the biggest Twin Flame paradoxes, you have to let go of what the happy end looks like so that you can manifest it. If you hold on too tightly to wanting physical union with your twin, you are in fact blocking the union you crave.

‘When you can be happy with or without your heart’s desire, it will suddenly appear, for your ship will come in over a “don’t care” sea.’

Florence Scovel Shinn

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Sabriyé Ayana is the leading expert on the Twin Flame journey and inner union process. As a Twin Flame leader, teacher and healer she helps Twin Flames understand that this journey is not just about creating a fairy-tale and they lived happily ever after together... It's an initiation path to Ascension. Download the free Inner Union Soul Alchemy manuscript to find out more.