I realize I am not winning popularity votes with these kind of blog articles, but I’m not the type to blow smoke up people’s you know whatsies…. just to make them feel good.
I give you the TRUTH, raw and real and that is what most people love me for. Because that is what is going to get you where you need to be on this journey, while sweet talking ya might feel good it’s also what get’s you stuck.
I am the girl that may not seem to give you what you want, but I give you what you need. This saves you loads of heartache, endlessly running in circles and lots of moolah that you can spend on the actual things that work instead of chasing rainbow unicorns and fairy tale solutions that don’t work.
Are you interested in what does work, read this previous article on Twin Flame healing here.
In this article we are going to tackle a pervasive issue within the Twin Flame community that is based on nothing but spiritual ego. I don’t think I know any other scene where people think they are much further than they generally are or where people use BIG words that don’t fit what they mean.
Let’s start with the language…
Incorrect use of language
My toes curl when I read some of the questions and comments posted online within the Twin Flame community, because there are so many people slinging around Twin Flame lingo without having a clue what they are really talking about. You may think well, let people be ignorant they will figure it out when they are meant to but as I will illustrate in this article there is a cost that comes with the misuse of these words.
Let’s look at some of the most misunderstood and therefor misused terms within the Twin Flame community.
#1 Awakened vs Unawakened
Many Divine feminines consider themselves the ‘Awakened’ twin and their counterpart unawakened. What they actually mean is that they are CONSCIOUSLY aware of the fact that they are on the Twin Flame journey and their twin is not.
To be truly awakened means that you have woken up to your true soul self, which has nothing to do with whether you realize you are on a spiritual journey or if you believe that you have met your Divine counterpart. Being en route to Paris and knowing that Paris is your destination, doesn’t actually magically bring you in Paris (France) you still have to travel the road that leads there to actually be there. The same applies to awakening, merely mentally grasping that you are not your ego and that your true identity is your soul is not the same as actually living from your soul essence.
The BIGGEST misunderstanding in this concept of the so called ‘unawakened’ twin, is the idea that the unconscious twin is somehow inferior to the twin who is consciously aware of the connection. This is not true, it is imperative that the unconscious twin is unconscious because this allows him/her to initiate the conscious twin on her/his Ascension path. If the unconscious twin, were as consciously aware of the connection they would not be able to subconsciously stick to the script that the Twin Flame couple created for their encounter here in the physical.
Yes, their not being consciously aware of the nature of the connection delays the much desired union that the consciously aware twin craves so deeply, but only to help the Twin Flame couple work through their subconscious wounding and release karma which aligns them to true Twin Flame union and not just a romantic relationship with one another.
The consciously aware, is made aware of the connection because otherwise she (or he) would not be able to push through the illusion of what is being played out in the physical reality. The Divine counterpart stays unconscious of the connection (which they never really are completely) because this allows them to do what they need to do in order to initiate their Twin Flame on his/her Ascension path.
They are a spiritual tag team and ‘he’ is not off the hook and just enjoying life, ‘he’ is helping ‘her’ face ‘her’ deepest wounding in order for ‘her’ to heal it. When ‘she’ does, ‘she’ makes a jump in vibrational frequency that “forces” ‘him’ to level up and match ‘her’ higher state of consciousness and state of being. They are both in this together, each playing their own vital part in order to both truly awaken in the true meaning of the word and that is to live their life in the physical as their soul self, aka becoming the highest expression of themselves (self-actualization/enlightenment).
#2 Union vs Committed relationships
Another word that gets flung around in all the wrong ways is the word union. At this moment (September 2019) there are NO TWIN FLAME COUPLES IN UNION. There are Twin Flame couples in a committed relationship with each other, but that is not true Twin Flame union. All the Twin Flame teachers claiming union, are in a romantic relationship with their twin and some don’t even have that either because their Twin Flame is not in embodiment or because the person they are with is not actually their Divine counterpart (some teachers are with ‘twin’ #2 or #3 and up).
Twin Flame union is not a romantic relationship, dating or marrying your twin.
You can’t be in or out of union with your Twin Flame, until you have reached union within and once you have reached unity consciousness within yourself you can’t lose it. Twin Flame union is the outer reflection, of this inner union (which I will clarify later on in this article) therefor once you have reached inner union and outer union with the twin (as above so below, as within so without) it can’t be lost. All these people on Twin Flame forums writing that they were in union with their twin, but are out of union now are only trying to say that they were in a romantic relationship with their twin but then broke up.
True Twin Flame union has nothing to do with your romantic dreams coming true, even though you will be together in the physical and be sexually intimate with each other. Because this is a union of two enlightened beings, it will be a complete new relationship template devoid of power struggles, lack of love and all the other problems regular romantic relationships are riddled with. But this is ONLY possible when the couple has overcome these old tendencies within themselves. Union is not what the other is able to give you, it’s what you are now able to offer the other because of what you have attained within yourself.
#3 Inner union
When I reached the inner union stage of my journey, which took over a year to be anchored fully, people left and right were saying they realized they had reached inner union as well. But here’s the thing inner union is not just being okay and happy on your own, inner union is not just ‘loving’ yourself and it’s definitely not merging energy bodies with your Twin Flame.
Inner union has nothing to do with the other, and everything to do with you.
Inner union is a lengthy process of bringing in your soul into the physical, which can only be done through intense inner work and deeply releasing of low vibrational energy held throughout lifetimes and lifetimes in the subconscious and vibrational field.
It is the inner sacred marriage of your own Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine and the inner Hieros Gamos of your soul with your 3rd dimensional self/ego. It’s making as above, so below – the vertical union with your own divinity. Twin Flame union is the horizontal union, of as within so without which is ONLY possible when you have achieved as above, so below. Inner union is a prerequisite for Twin Flame or outer union, because it’s the physical reflection of your own inner state of consciousness and inner state of being.
Often people have these beautiful experiences of merging with their Twin Flame in energy, which overwhelms them and feels wonderful because they so deeply desire it. I have yet to see any of these experiences translate into physical reality because they don’t and they are certainly not an indication of inner or outer union.
Inner union is the TRUE objective of this journey, this returning to Oneness within oneself and when one does, Divine union in the physical follows because it is an outer reflection of one’s inner state of being.
As far as I am concerned ‘Reunion’ is a term we actually don’t need because it happens on it’s own. For some it is the meeting of the Twin Flame couple in the physical, for others it’s when the twins reunite in true Twin Flame union.
I have already explained that Twin Flame union is a byproduct of inner union and can ONLY be attained through creating inner union and the same pretty much applies to meeting each other in the physical.
You are either scheduled to meet your Twin Flame in this lifetime or not. If you are not, then it won’t happen. This is because the Twin Flame journey is not primarily about ending up in a romantic relationship, it’s a fast-track to Ascension (download the free Inner Union Soul Alchemy manuscript to find out more). This also means that you have been working for lifetimes and lifetimes towards your Ascension, this didn’t just start now in this lifetime.
According to Elizabeth Claire Prophet who already taught Twin Flame and Ascension teachings in the ’70’s and ’80’s an initiate has to have balanced 51% of their karma to start the Ascension process, souls work towards this goal over multiple lifetimes in order to be able to do so.
Unlike a soul mate connection a Twin Flame can’t be summoned/manifested/attracted into one’s life, because the souls have to be ready for the series of Ascension initiations that the Twin Flame journey consists of. Which all depends on their soul’s evolution over time If the soul has not evolved to the level of Ascension, then Twin Flame union won’t be on the agenda for that lifetime either – because the soul is not ready for inner union just quite yet.
The Twin Flame couple may schedule to meet and even in order to be together in the physical, but only to help each other release deep wounding and karma in preparation for their individual Ascension further on in their soul timelines. So the word reunion can be used both ways and be correct.
When merely used to describe coming together with the Twin Flame in a romantic relationship, it’s way too big a term for that. Especially because the souls use distance and closeness to trigger the subconscious wounding within the Twin Flame couple and so romance can be a fickle mistress, who is here today and gone tomorrow – until the couple is aligned to true Twin Flame union.
Within the Twin Flame community third party relationships, or a relationship with someone other than the Twin Flame are called ‘karmic’ relationships which is an incorrect term. It’s also used to somehow make that connection seem inferior to their own connection with whom they believe to be their Twin Flame. As a Twin Flame you are neither superior (spiritual ego) nor does the other person in your Twin Flame’s life have to be a karmic connection, karma happens within all soul connections.
Nobody in your life is there by accident, they are all carefully crafted soul contracts that you have called in on a soul level for your highest and their highest good. This is also true for third party relationships of your own, or of your Twin Flame – these are soul mate connections of both you and your twin, who are committed to assisting the Twin Flame couple in their union process.
Granted they seem to obstruct the Twin Flame couple from coming together, because of their own intimate relationship with one of the Divine counterparts, but it is exactly the illusion of loss or the illusion that someone can be less or better than – that these setups deeply trigger in the twin counterpart that is ‘forced’ to deal with them. Nothing like the so called other woman to help trigger deep wounding around self-worth and fear of loss.
Wounding that needs to be released in order to create inner union and to be able to truly bring in new relationship templates instead of rehashing ones that never worked to begin with. Deeply held beliefs around inferiority or superiority IS what fuels power struggles within regular romantic relationships. Remember Twin Flames have come to bring in new relationship templates that are based on unity, equality and unconditional love – which is why any conflicting subconscious programming first needs to be removed in order to be able to truly bring in something new. Third party relationships trigger these deeply held subconscious faulty programming, which would otherwise make union, inner or outer impossible.
#6 Ascension & Kundalini awakenings
Despite ALL the current planetary vibrational support (think of Schumann resonance) Ascension doesn’t just fall from the sky and bop you on the head. The heavens aren’t going to split open and throw a lightening bolt at you, that will instantly make you reach enlightenment. Neither will hitting your yoga mat or meditation pillow daily, really make much difference despite the fact that this is how yogis reached mukti (release from the cycle of rebirth impelled by the law of karma, the transcendent state attained as a result of being released from the cycle of rebirth).
If you really want release from the cycle of rebirth impelled by the law of karma, you have to dive into the subconscious and face your own inner dragons and demons from this lifetime and previous lifetimes.
As psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jun said:
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
Many people fail to do the real Ascension work, despite the fact that they are VERY BUSY thinking they are moving mountains, when in reality nothing earth shattering is taking place. This is because they are focusing on the positive and the light side, but this does not help them release the vibrational gunk and sludge that one can only find in the so called negative and dark side, aka the shadow side. There is no real coming to Ascension or raising your vibrational frequency in any way that matters, without facing your inner darkness.
Which sounds very ominous and spooky, but actually is just a question of clearing your fears and false beliefs from previous embodiments that you are still carrying with you due to unresolved trauma and karma. This is what I help my clients do in the Akashic Record Clearings that I offer, clear out deep trauma and karmic patterns often spanning over lifetimes and still bleeding through in their current life.
In the Twin Flame scene many people talk about Ascension without truly grasping it’s meaning. They think their third eye or heart chakra is opening at the drop of a hat, when in reality it is the above mentioned past life gunk and sludge that is blocking the chakras to begin with. If you want to open your chakras and really raise your Kundalini then you have to unravel your soul’s past.
Often when you hear people talking about their Kundalini awakening, they have these stories of mostly sexual bliss. I am just going to be blunt here, there are a lot of people merely bullshitting themselves about where they are in their spiritual journey. When the Kundalini does awaken, it will bring up all your inner gunk and sludge automatically because this is what is blocking your chakras and as long as your chakras are blocked the Kundalini surge CANNOT move through them. You have NO CHOICE but to face your deepest wounding, your biggest fears and false beliefs because that is what blocks your chakras to begin with.
Sex has little to do with the awakening of the Kundalini or having it rise up for that matter, sexual ecstasy is not the same thing as spiritual ecstasy or spiritual awakening. The only real connection between sex and raising the Kundalini energy is that having sex (even more with the Twin Flame) triggers the subconscious wounding that is keeping the chakras blocked. This is also why relationships when they become sexual often bring so much drama, because they are triggering past life trauma.
But you DON’T NEED to have sex in order to be able to raise or awaken the Kundalini. You need to address the subconscious wounding that is blocking the chakras, clear that and the Kundalini energy will start rising on it’s own.
#7 3D & 5D
Many Twin Flames think they are already in 5D, but in order to really access and anchor in 5D guess what? You have to release all the lower vibrational frequencies from all the past life trauma that you are still holding subconsciously in your vibrational field.
You can’t sustainably raise your vibrational frequency without releasing what is weighing you down first.
I have heard Divine Feminines claim they are already in 5D and that their twin is still in 3D, which is an oxymoron because anyone who is anchored in 5D has transcended duality thinking and therefor would not claim to be superior or inferior in comparison to someone else…
Another confusion about the dimensions within the Twin Flame community is the idea that 5D is somehow up there and 3D is down here, this is incorrect. Dimensions are not locations or physical places, they are states of consciousness and states of being. Both 3D and 5D are realities that are experienced in the PHYSICAL. The 5th dimension is not merely an energetic reality, all realities exist in energy first before they manifest physically – this is true for 3D and 5D as well.
#8 False, karmic, catalyst etc Twins
Let’s take the blinders off people, around 30% has been wrong about their Twin Flame connection according to a poll I took recently. There are many different names to call these experiences, but let’s just call a spade a spade, these labels only serve to cushion the blow to the ego that you were wrong about this connection. Don’t beat yourself up if you were wrong, it happens a lot even among Twin Flame teachers. It is nothing to be ashamed about or that you need to hide under euphemistic labels.
It is important to tackle this one, not to shame those who have been wrong but to bring the truth to light. The false Twin Flame concept is like the Chinese term Sheng nu meaning leftover ladies. Through the one child policy and female infanticide that was already practiced for centuries – China has close to 24 million more men than women currently. To prevent these men from being left without a wife, China has unleashed a mass media campaign to shame their women into marrying as quickly as possible. The problem isn’t the leftover women, the real problem is the leftover men. This problem is masked with telling women that there is something wrong with them if they are “unmarried over the age of 27” or blame them by telling them that being leftover is a “failure to find a husband” due to “overly high expectations for marriage partners”.
Likewise the false Twin Flame concept has become such a dogmatic belief within the Twin Flame community that, it almost has become a cult on it’s own. Some people even believe now that you first have to have a ‘false’ twin or catalyst experience to find your true Twin Flame. What began as a term to save face (aka avoid the humiliation of being wrong) has now been granted a life of it’s own, when it doesn’t even exist. In reality there is no such thing as a false Twin Flame, someone either IS or IS NOT your Twin Flame – those are the only two flavors available.
Everything else was just an attempt to cover up the real issue, but the problems we create when we cover up the truth are often bigger than the humiliation we try to avoid. Because people start believing these falsified truths and adjust their expectations and actions accordingly. In China this has led to women having to use the art of Sajiao (a form of cute pouting and playing small) to make their significant other feel more masculine. Seriously with the current men to women ratio in China, women should be able to have their pick. Instead they have to resort to playing games and bending over backwards to aha yes you guessed it – not be leftover.
Within the Twin Flame community the false Twin Flame concept, has led people to expect to HAVE TO experience a false Twin Flame connection to prepare them for the real thing, which isn’t necessary at all. It also takes up a lot of bandwidth through people worrying if this person is their TRUE or false twin, if you put it like that then guess what? You have 7.7 billion false Twin Flames including me – I am also your false Twin Flame. You only have ONE Twin Flame and everyone else is just NOT your Twin Flame. Please stop over-complicating your life.
#9 Divine Feminine & Divine Masculine
The danger that occurs here is the idea that without ‘your Divine Masculine’ you can’t be WHOLE and complete. We all have an inner Divine Feminine and Masculine and are not dependent on something or someone outside of us. Plus until your Twin Flame has become the highest expression of themselves, there is probably not that much Divine about them they are just being their human self – as are you.
Referring to your Divine counterpart as your Divine Masculine or DM for short is somewhat weird honestly, because basically all you mean is your twin. But it can also lead to a whole bunch of gender confusion because men both gay and straight can be the Divine Feminine and the same applies to lesbian or straight women who can be the Divine Masculine in the Twin Flame connection.
Granted they help make awesome video titles such as ‘The Divine Masculine is coming back, he is ready to leave his karmic!’ or ‘The DF has had it, she is ready to walk away!’ but other than that they are just identification words for certain subgroups within the Twin Flame collective or aspects of your soul.
It’s like the Indian word “dhanyavaad” (thank you) a word in the language that is not used like we would do in the West, where we basically say thank you for everything. In most cases saying ‘thank you’ is considered an overkill within the Indian culture and it’s pretty much the same with referring to your self or your Twin Flame as Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine because these are soul aspects and not an attribute of your human form. Which is also why it is somewhat pretentious to use these terms individually.
When we use the language of the Gods to describe the mundane, we will have nothing left to describe the Divine when we experience it.
This is EXACTLY what happens in the Twin Flame scene, where BIG words are used for small things which desensitizes people to their true meaning and leaves them thinking they are already ‘there’ when their journey has hardly begun.
The costs of thinking you are already ‘there’
When reading through the above you have probably discovered the red thread running through all of the discussed and that is spiritual ego. Every example is either about superiority/inferiority or avoiding losing face. combined with pumping oneself up to seem more than they are.
Let’s use wealth as an analogy here.
The truly rich don’t show off their money, they don’t buy flashy cars, shiny Rolexes or high-end brand clothing. Only people wanting to appear rich spend their money like that. People who have money invest it in what is important to them and for the majority of people who have money, letting others know that they have it is not important to them. I even know a couple of millionaires that buy clothes second hand because they don’t feel they need to dress the part.
In the same way, the truly enlightened aren’t the people banging themselves on the chest and telling anyone willing to listen about how enlightened they are. They don’t need to, because they know who they are. The only people that need to pretend that they are better or more special/spiritual/superior than others, are the people who are still uncovering their true nature and stuck in ego on their way there.
Why point that out though, you may ask?
Because thinking you are already ‘there’ comes at a cost and it can be a high cost. Plus many of these programs are subconscious, the people banging themselves on the chest seldom do so because they realize what they are doing. No they can only do so, because they are unaware of their subconscious fears and false beliefs that are having them behave in this way. Which is also why I took the trouble to write this article, not to blame and shame people for not getting it – but in order to help them SHIFT THEIR PERSPECTIVE and understanding of the matter.
Above you have read many examples of already being ‘there’, another one is believing you have already fully healed, which I once thought in the past as well until I understood that our biggest wounds are buried deepest in our subconscious mind. But it all comes down to the same thing, when you believe that you are already ‘there’, there is nothing more that you can do. It’s done, you are just waiting for your Twin Flame to wake up to and get with the program.
I bet you have caught yourself thinking this a couple of times on your journey. I know I have certainly thought it at least a dozen times on my own journey, even if I have learned not to buy into it. It’s a pervasive thought and a tempting one at that, because it means you are off the hook. The ball is in HIS (her) court now! (I know you have thought that more than a couple of times too, even if it was in slightly different words).
But the thing is that as Divine Feminines we go first and when we dig our heels into the sand and refuse to budge we shut down the whole process for ourselves and our Twin Flame. Remember the Divine Masculine initiates the Divine Feminine, but as she heals and raises her vibrational frequency the Divine Masculine is pulled to level up as well in order to match the Divine Feminines new vibrational frequency. When we get stuck in our ego, it’s not just us getting stuck – everything is forced to a halt.
This is why so many Twin Flames keep going in circles because they keep failing the initiations. When their Twin Flame starts a relationship with someone else for example, they take it personally instead of understanding that even this experience is happening for their highest good and will turn out to be a blessing in disguise. But who can blame them many so called Twin Flame teachers, teach interference, dark forces and wishful thinking, telling them that third party relationships are either an attack on their union, a mistake or something that can be avoided. This is what happens when the blind start leading the blind.
Don’t be afraid to lose face or look stupid
The best attitude on this journey is to be open to the truth NO MATTER how painful or inconvenient, which means that you are also open to adapt your opinion to new developments instead of thinking you have got it all figured out. Stay open and humble, be willing to look like a fool. Because in the long run, the truth always catches up with everyone. You may look like a fool today to everyone who can’t see the truth yet, but there will come a day that the veils will be lifted and others will see what you have felt to be true all along.
In the end it doesn’t really matter what other people think of you, unless you are seeking their approval. And if that is the case then the question that follows is:
Why is someone else’s approval of you important to you? Who are you trying to impress?
The answer to that question may actually be the next step to deep healing for you.
Because my Twin Flame journey has been out there publicly since the beginning, I have been ridiculed and judged by my twin’s friends, random people on the internet, I have lost both friends and clients from my previous company who didn’t understand what the hell I was talking about.
But you know what, that is a consequence of raising your vibrational frequency, old energies won’t match yours anymore and will naturally fall away. The new reality that I have stepped into because of this journey is a thousand times better than where I was when I met my Twin Flame back in 2014. So in the end it is really who laugh last, laughs longest.
While I have built a thriving business, shared my unique gift with the world helping thousands of other Twin Flames, traveled to far away places with my family and released myself of everything that was weighing me down which has propelled me forward on my soul’s journey, these people that have judged and ridiculed me have not come much further in their lives. How could they? They were too busy finding fault in others.
This journey is about learning to trust yourself and those who trust themselves don’t have problems deviating from the crowd. They don’t need to fit in and they don’t need to impress others, they are enough just being themselves.
I pray this article helps you identify those parts in yourself where you are overcompensating, where you fear you might not be enough, where you are stuck in ego or where you believe that you have to be perfect and so on. When you can be wrong, when you can be vulnerable and admit to yourself that you have no clue, the Universe can step in and show you the way. Which is simply not possible if you convince yourself that you already know everything and you are already ‘there’.
If you are interested and excited to know how I can help you in this process, check out my Akashic Record Clearings to release deep pain and trauma (including fears and false beliefs) or join the Twin Flame Tribe & the Inner Union Soul Alchemy Program in which I share step by step how to come into inner union.
Sending you love and light on your Ascension path and Divine partnership journey, you are forever protected and guided. All is well.
If this article resonates with you, please share it abundantly. Thank you.
Lots of love,